The Gossip Party Special Report: Mr. & Mrs. Tom Cruise

It's official.  Mr. and Mrs. Tom Cruise have made a public spectacle out of their wedding.  The funny thing is, they have actually been married for a few days.  They legally tied the knot in LA before leaving for Italy.  This was all just a big show.  I wonder who wanted it more: Tom, Katie or Insidertainment Tonight? 

I'm sure Insidertainment Tonight is going to drag this out over a few months and tell us about every single detail, but from what I hear Tom made a beautiful bride and Katie didn't look so bad herself.  She's been dieting like a mad woman trying to loose the baby weight.  Speaking of Suri, she was in tote the entire time.  Every picture I've seen has Tom carrying the baby and dragging Katie along behind... "keep up bitch, you're not gonna ruin my day!"

The guest list had few surprises.  I was shocked to see Jim Carey there.  Oprah and I talked about crashing it, but I think Gayle talked her out of it.  Brooke Shields' new friendship with the Scientology psychos is a bit too weird.  I wonder if Tom brainwashed her.  All of the scientologists were on hand; and of course, the minister was an alien leader himself. 

If you can't get enough, click over to People's website.  They're doing their share of over dramatizing this as well.